An open letter to the South

Dear Louisiana,

I don’t mean to pick on you, but I’ve heard that this bug of mine is quite common on the South and quite frankly I want to know why. What is the deal with croakies?

So confused.

I just don’t understand. I drunkenly asked a guy what they were for this Saturday at the tailgate his reply was: “So they don’t fall off.”

“What are you doing to make them fall off?”

“Stuff like windsurfing.”

“Are you windsurfing right now?”

“Erm… no.” EXACTLY.

Admittedly, this entire rant is coming from a girl who dropped her sunglasses in the lake whilst getting into the coxes seat yesterday (they were fished out in the end!) but I just don’t understand the obsession. Does it really take a huge amount more effort to put your sunglasses in the collar of your top or in your bag when you’re not wearing them?

I have a theory that the large concentration of fraternity members who wear croakies do so because their egos extend out the back of their heads and they need an extension to keep their sunglasses on. This is the only explanation I can come up with. Seriously, someone please explain this whole thing to me.

Kind regards,

Megan

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