In hindsight, when I got to the airport and answered the question “Has anyone asked you to bring anything with you?”, I should have answered yes. Fortunately, Tommy was kind enough not to have filled his Mitt Romney plushie with cocaine before he stuffed it into my bag and so began a month full of adventures for ol’ Mitt.
First, he came with me up to Leicester to see just how the British like to party. By that I mean, ULBC CHRISTMAS SMURF SOCIAL!
I think it’s safe to say that he enjoyed himself, especially when Sarah crawled into her bed with the words, “Mhmmeehhmm no shower. Blue sheets. Imma wash them” and then fell asleep in a record time of about 20 seconds. I know, because she started snoring. I would’ve taken him out with us but as we know most drunks are quite grabby and I wasn’t sure how a Republican politician would cope with a bar crawl in below freezing conditions followed by two hours of cheesy music ( Google “Don’t you want me baby – The Human League” for a sample of my most requested song of all time).
I then introduced Mitt to Jo, Laura, Millie and Onesie, my former housemates.
We were too busy taking awkward family photos to document our time with Mitt but I can tell you as a first-hand witness that he went to places with Onesie that many men (and women, I’m sure) dream of.
Then it was time to prepare for Christmas! My mum reacted with screams of, “It was my best tree to date and you’ve done this to it!” When I added my own touch:
And on Christmas morning Miss Over-excited woke me up bright and early to get her LSU themed presents, which she then wore for three days in a row.
Not to mention the hilarious Christmas card she wrote for mum.
Mitt then came with me to my grandparent’s house and enjoyed the luxuries of rosé cava on Christmas day, Santa Si making an appearance, Christmas dinner with the Arletts and the QUEEN’S SPEECH!
It is a Christmas day tradition in our house for everybody to reluctantly play a game of Trivial Pursuit, such a tradition in fact that the game we own has been around since 1985 and is so out of date that you have to be over sixty to be in with a chance of knowing half the answers. This year, however, there was anarchy. Auntie Susie abandoned her team after an extended losing streak, Granny confused the TV for my Grandad shouting answers from the lounge and my over-zealous father blurted out an answer to the opposition because he was so excited about knowing it. All this meant that team Peter and Megan won with a comfortable victory of two cheeses!
Mitt topped things off by spending New Year’s with me and my sister, unfortunately he had a bit too much to drink and passed out by 10.30pm or at least I think that’s what happened, I might be confusing Mitt Romney with my friend Joe Pearson. Regardless, I think it’s safe to say that Mitt’s trip to England helped finish his 2012 off on a high note.
I’ll have to see what other adventures I can find for him to do before I fly back to Louisiana next Wednesday.