Fine. I never actually got round to writing about the BPWC. Selena mentioned it first and I stalled her in the hope that she would forget (she did), but then DeJean publicly shamed me and so it seems I am finally getting around to writing about it.
I think I’ve been putting it off because BPWC was such a visual event and I was being lazy about sorting through the photos and it was around the same time as a bunch of other stuff. But here we go! Get ready. While you read you have to play two games. The first is called ‘Spot Jake’, how many times can you see Jake Braun and still be equally as offended by his outfit? The second is judging the winner of the costume competition.
BPWC was an extravaganza of a party, highly structured and creative with guaranteed attendance because people didn’t want to let their partners down. I partnered Tyler and we were Egypt! I had way too much fun painting our costumes and writing “King of Beer Pong” on his headdress and “Bad at Beer Pong” on mine, as it turned out this was an omen.
Here we have Argentina and Mexico.
Whatever country Courtney’s sister and Emily’s cousin decided to be in the end
England (all they needed was a teapot)
And finally, American Samoa!
Knowing me I’ve managed to miss a team so yell at me if that’s you. Also, we mustn’t forget our wonderful referee… JAKE BRAUN!
Before any games had begun DeJean explained the rules for the evening and I was introduced to a rule called the death cup which I had never heard of before. The death cup rule, as it turns out, means that if a member of the opposing team shoots a ball that makes it into your drinking cup then the game is over and the losing team must drink all the beer that remains on the table. So, Tyler and I are playing our first game of beer pong (you can see where this is going, right?) and not really expecting to make it past the first round but he’s doing a good job making up for how terrible I am and everything is wonderful. We’re maybe five minutes in and Germany, our opponents, launch a ball our way, it hits me in the chest, rolls down my beautifully painted necklace and lands gently into my full cup of beer. Everything goes slow motion for a while as the four of us who are playing kind of gape at each other and then in the distance, from the other side of the party I just hear DeJean yell, “DEEEEEAAAAAAATTTTTTTTHHHHHH CUUUUUUUUUUUPP!” And everyone turns around to admire the fact that my costume is ergonomically designed to enable the death cup to happen.
I still maintain that we were never going to make it past the first round so why not go out spectacularly?
Then the night descended into a true crew party. Carly was so drunk that when I asked her how she was she just burst into tears and when pressed as to what was upsetting her the only thing she could come up with was a teary, “I’m just really drunk!” I discovered that Will and Rob weren’t wearing any underwear under their kilts and groped Paul.
Shirts were ripped
Wigs were stolen
Jake continued to work his referee outfit.
I’d love to say that I stayed for the final but I didn’t, Lillian mentioned Cane’s and within seconds about ten of us decided that waiting for food wasn’t an option and so off we went. But I do have it on good authority that Germany were the eventual winners!
Congratulations Deutschland! It took a while but they finally won a war!
So, how many times were you offended by Jake’s costume?
And who do you deem the winner of the costume contest?
All photos by Danielle LeBlanc