My first few weeks in my new home were pretty tame considering I now live in Miami. So, on the recommendation of my roommate Jaimie who seems to have spent the majority of her twenties serial dating, I joined the online dating site OkCupid because, she said, “You get to take quizzes!” Well, I love taking quizzes plus it seemed like a good way to force me to get out of the house and give me stuff to write about. So under her supervision I set up a profile.
“You need a full body shot so people know you aren’t fat, and a photo that shows your teeth,” she told me.
On OkCupid your first port of call is messaging people that you are interested in. The majority of my interactions were perfectly normal. But a handful were bizarre to the point of hilarious and really confirmed why I decided that this was a valuable writing adventure.
Firstly, here we can see an example of the importance of usernames. This guy had called himself ‘lonelymexican’ which broke my heart, but not enough to make me want to reply to this series of messages.
Next, the drunk pickup line at a bar approach:
Woah, I’m gonna need you to tell me how often a line like that actually works. I actually messaged this guy back and asked him if he had had any success with it. He replied, “I don’t know. You’re the first person who has answered. Has it worked?”
“No,” I said.
Then, the proof that some people just can’t take no for an answer.
And my all time favourite:
I’m finding the whole thing absolutely hilarious although I’m sick to death of telling people my life story. If it’s boring me, then how on earth can it be interesting anyone else?
And I’ve even been on a couple of dates! Which, for anyone who knows quite how much I love my bed, is a real feat. Posts about those are in the pipeline!